Why I want to parent like a grandparent!

When we adopted Amy and Josie, my mother was concerned that she might find it difficult to connect with our children and that she would do or say something wrong. If I’m honest, I probably still feel a bit like this myself at times, although I now realise I am unlikely to cause any lasting traumatic effects! However, one of my highlights as a parent is watching my parents and Mr March’s mum with our children. This was especially true this weekend; one of the highlights being watching my dad scooter round the garden with my girls.

It seems to me that grandparents seem to have a knack for parenting in a very PACE centred way (What is meant by PACE parenting). They seem much more playful than I am (I find being playful really difficult at times). They use gentle persuasion, games and patience to encourage them to clean their teeth or put their shoes on. They can play at being a little bit silly at times too which the girls find really engaging.

As grandparents sit just outside the immediate family they seem a bit more distanced from household tensions. They are able to see everyone’s side, and as such, use acceptance and empathy to communicate that they understand how each person in the family is feeling.  Added to this our grandparents are also able to ask questions that as a parent I don’t always make time to, and in that way they can be more curious and open to understanding the world of their grandchildren.

Of course grandparents aren’t with the children all the time and don’t necessarily have to worry about all the concerns that parents have to such as running a family household, going out to work, walking the dogs and making sure everyone’s clothes are washed and ironed when needed. But maybe we as parents should make some time to set those worries aside and spend more dedicated time parenting like a grandparent.

I would like to thank the March family grandparents for all their love and support.

What do you think? Do your families find grandparental relations helpful?

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18 thoughts on “Why I want to parent like a grandparent!

  1. I totally agree, grandparents are amazing with kids. I suppose they’re doing it second time around with more experience behind them and without as much of the responsibility (no sleepless nights, must be nice). Your dad is fantastic by the way, loving the scooter action. #bigpinklink

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  2. You make a really good point here, I’ve definitely noticed with my sisters kids that they may be playing up for their parents but when a grandparent, auntie or uncle really plays with them, talks to them or connects somehow they seem much happier and their behaviour improves. It’s much easier when you aren’t dealing with bad nights and constant tantrums though! #dreamteam

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  3. Your dad is awesome!! It sounds like they have a fabulous relationship with the children! We have 2 sets of grandparents each at very different ends of the scale!! My parents have a flower bed and vegetable patch for the children, at their house, and spend hours teaching them all about planting, growing and looking after the plants. My dad plays endless games with them, and answers all their questions better than I can. My husbands parents on the other hand, openly admit they have no time for small children, and they barely see them unless we phone and ask if they would like to. They’re very awkward around the children when they do see them. It’s so odd to have 2 such very different sets of grandparents! My mum is bemused by the inlaws attitude, although I’d imagine slightly pleased as it means she can have full monopoly of the children!
    Thanks for sharing with #bigpinklink

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  4. I love watching my parents as grandparents – it’s a very different approach to their parenting! You’re spot on – they’re far more relaxed, far more playful, and far more inclined to let them get away with murder! P.S. Your Dad is awesome!! #KCACOLS

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  5. Oh my goodness, I so get this! I very often watch my Mum & Dad with my little boy and think ‘Why can’t I be more like that?!’ I thought it was just me. I’m relieved I found this post and have learned that I’m not alone. Thanks for posting, great read. #BloggerClubUK

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  6. Fantastic photo! It’s so lovely to see these type of images of Grandparents playing with children. It’s another layer and source of fun and games for them. We don’t have Mr Buttons parents around anymore, so the time that we all spend with my parents feels even more precious. I just wish we lived closer. Thank you so much for linking up to the #DreamTeam x

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  7. I watch my mum with my daughter (they are best buds) and I sometimes wonder if I’m doing something wrong. But then I remember I have to be so much more than a love-giver / entertainer at home. Cleaner, chef, disciplinarian (list goes on). I just think my children enjoy the undivided attention that their grandparents can give them. Hopefully, my time will come! x

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  8. What a lovely reminder to parent more ‘slowly’. I remember reading an article about this, how we should allow our children to explore the world as we walk to the shops or go to the park, instead of rushing them around in a stroller. I think it’s similar to what you’ve mentioned about pace parenting. The Grandparents are more likely to do this as they have realised (with all their wisdom/life experience) that ‘being in the moment’ is what life is about, as you’ve said, they use gentle persuasion, games and patience. Thank you for sharing with #StayClassy, I think this is such an important message for parents now-a-days who are glued to their phone and always running around (me included!).

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  9. I think it’s lovely to see grandparents with their grandchildren. Parents can’t be like that until they have grandchildren someday – that will be so fun! 🙂 It’s a totally different ball game. Thanks so much for joining us at #BloggerClubUK x

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